Thursday, September 28, 2017

I came up with more nicknames for Jonah on VEEP... royalty charges will be quite nominal.

As a refresher, I recently met a Congressional staffer and we were discussing which TV series about Washington were most realistic.

He stated, without hesitation, HBO's Veep.

During the course of the series, Jonah Ryan -- tall, geeky, socially awkward, and (weirdly) also possessing delusions of grandeur -- makes the transition from low-level White House staffer to... Congressman.

The staffer I was schmoozing with said that Ryan's unlikely ascendancy, through a bizarre series of events, was entirely plausible. He said most Congressmen he knew were complete dunces and made Ryan look like Einstein.

The series is very funny and one of the best parts are the nicknames other members of Veep's staff call Ryan.

1. Jonad
2. J Rock
3. Jizzy Gillespie
4. Jack and the Giant Jackoff
5. Gayleon
6. Tinkerballs
7. Wadzilla
8. One Erection
9. The Pointless Giant
10. Jimpanzee
11. The 60-Foot Virgin
12. Jono Ono
13. Hagrid’s Nutsack
14. Scrotum Poll
15. Transgenderformers
16. 12 Years a Slave to Jerking Off
17. Benedict Cum-In-His-Own-Hand
18. Guyscraper
19. The Cloud Botherer
20. Supercalifragilisticexpialidickcheese
21. Teenage Mutant Ninja A**hole
22. Spewbacca
23. Dikembe Mutomtard (while playing basketball)
24. Jolly Green Jizz Face

Video here.

My new additions to the list, composed during several snooze-fests on flights, include:

  1. Scooby Douche
  2. Col. Sansdick
  3. Ja Drool
  4. Tim Tardashian
  5. Sperman Cain
  6. Sasqueef
  7. Kareem Abdul Jackwad
  8. Dildo Daggins
  9. Homeless Simpson
  10. Hodork
  11. Moby Dickless
  12. Vin Scrotum
  13. Pee Wee Spermin
  14. Mr. T-bag
  15. Aunt Jizzmima
  16. Thunderdope
  17. Captain Queef
  18. Richard M Dickless
  19. Sackless Fifth Avenue
  20. Hulk Homeless
  21. Underdope
  22. Pole Fault
  23. Mr. Bo Dangles
  24. USS Neverpoon
  25. Giant Opie
  26. Count Jackula
  27. Ejac the Ripper
  28. Count Fartenstein
  29. Red Roofie Inn
  30. Schmucky Charms
  31. Tiny Dangler
Well, they made me laugh, anyhow.

Hat tip: BadBlue Uncensored News.

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