Doug Ross @ Journal

What your car says about you

This is a long-running viral email but still rings true. Like it or not, your car does say a lot about who you are. Or rather, who you think you are. Or who you might want to be someday ("Sean Connery, can I please borrow the Aston-Martin?").

Buick Park Avenue - I am older than 34 of the 50 states.
Cadillac Eldorado - I am a very good Mary Kay salesman.
Chevrolet Camaro - I enjoy beating up people.
Datsun 280Z - I have a kilo of cocaine in my wheel well.
Geo Storm - I will start the 11th grade in the Fall.
Geo Tracker - I will start the 12th grade in the Fall.
Honda del Sol - I have always said, half a convertible is better than no convertible at all.
Isuzu Impulse - I do not give a rip about J.D. Power or his reports.
Jeep Wrangler - I am fiercely independent, just like all my friends with Jeeps.
Mazda Miata - I do not fear being decapitated by an eighteen-wheeler.
Nissan 300ZX - I have yet to complete my divorce proceedings.
Peugeot 505 Diesel - I am on the EPA's Ten Most Wanted List.
Plymouth Fury - I like driving an air-conditioned sofa that can carry your car in my trunk as a spare.
Pontiac Trans AM - I have a switchblade in my sock.
Porsche 944 - I am dating big haired women that otherwise would be inaccessible to me.
Rolls Royce Silver Shadow - I think Pat Buchanan is a tad too liberal.
Subaru Legacy - I have always wanted a Japanese car even more inferior than Isuzu.
Volvo 740 Wagon - I am frightened of my wife.
Volvo 240 - Other drivers are unsafe. Let me go ahead and pull out in front of this guy to slow him down

My Car Speaks For Itself