Agenda for Democratic National Convention

Junior Cub Reporter Biff Spackle located the tippity-top secret agenda for the DNC.

2008 Democrat National Convention
Schedule of Events
 7:00 pm OPENING FLAG BURNING
 7:15 pm PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE TO THE UNITED NATIONS
 7:20 pm Ted Kennedy PROPOSES A TOAST TO Barack Obama
 7:25 pm OPENING PRAYER - Reverend Jeremiah Wright
 7:45 pm CEREMONIAL TREE HUGGING - Darryl Hannah
 7:55 pm Ted Kennedy PROPOSES A TOAST TO Joe Biden
 8:00 pm GLOBAL WARMING OMFG!!!!!!!!! - Al Gore
 8:15 pm GAY WEDDING PLANNING - Rosie O'Donnell
 8:35 pm Ted Kennedy PROPOSES A TOAST TO Hillary Clinton
 8:40 pm CHARGING OUR TROOPS WITH WAR CRIMES - John Kerry
 9.00 pm MEMORIAL SERVICE FOR SADDAM AND HIS SONS - Cindy Sheehan and Susan Sarandon
10:00 pm ANSWERING MACHINE ETIQUETTE - Alec Baldwin
11:00 pm Ted Kennedy PROPOSES A TOAST TO Evan Bayh
11:05 pm COLLECTION FOR THE OSAMA BIN LADEN KIDNEY TRANSPLANT FUND - Babs Streisand
11:15 pm FREE THE FREEDOM FIGHTERS FROM GUANTANAMO BAY - Sean Penn
11:30 pm OVAL OFFICE AFFAIRS - William Jefferson Clinton
11:45 pm Ted Kennedy PROPOSES A TOAST TO Nancy Pelosi's Rack
11:50 pm HOW GEORGE BUSH BROUGHT DOWN THE WORLD TRADE TOWERS - Howard Dean
12:15 am FREE THE MINUTEMEN IN IRAQ'S PRISONS - Michael Moore
12:25 am Ted Kennedy PROPOSES A TOAST TO Paris Hilton
12:30 am SATELLITE ADDRESS - Mahmoud Ahmadinejad
12:45 am NOMINATION OF BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA - Nancy Pelosi
1:00 am Ted Kennedy SINGS NATIONAL ANTHEM
1:05 am CORONATION OF BARACK HUSSEIN OBAMA
1:30 am Ted Kennedy PROPOSES A TOAST TO Ritt Momney
1:35 am Bill Clinton asks Ted Kennedy to drive Hillary home.

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