Finally: a realistic home security ad!

  *Creak!*

  Did you hear that?

  It's our first night in the new house... do you want me to check?

  Are you f*****g kidding me? Hell yes, I want you to check, you lazy SOB!

  What the...?

  KA-BLAM!! KA-BLAM!! ............ *** Thump! ***

  Problem solved, babe!

  Nice double-tap, dear! I'm so happy we invested in a Glockk Home Security System™!