I only need one paragraph of Bill Keller's "writing" to fisk an entire op-ed

A little career advice for failed New York Times editor -- and current columnist -- Bill Keller: apply to SNL. They're always looking for comedy writers.

Just forward the lede on your latest brain secretion in the cover letter:

Just a few winters ago my wife and I took our daughters to witness the inauguration of a man who had campaigned on hope and embodied possibility. We are pretty immune to political euphoria, but, circulating among the footsore pilgrims, we could imagine our country had embraced the idea that we were all in this together. When the newly sworn-in president congratulated us all on choosing unity of purpose over recriminations and worn-out dogmas, we wanted to believe that we had done exactly that...

Recriminations and worn-out dogmas?

BWHAHHWHAHAHAHAHAHHA HA HA AHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHWHHWAHHAHAHAHHA HWHHAWAHHWAHHWAHHHAHWHAHHA HAWHAHWHAHWHHAHWHAHWHAWHAHNAMAHWHAHWHAHW AHWHAHWHAWHH *gasp* AHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA *cough* KAJHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA *choke* HAHAHHWHWHAHAHA *wheeze*

Hold on. Gotta. Catch breath.

Wow. I think I just wrenched my clavicle.

How are these for 'Recriminations'?

• Obama Blames Arab Spring and Japan's Earthquake on Struggling Economy and Job Situation, 8/5/11.
• Obama Blames Messy Democracy for His Failed Policies, 8/3/11; the president at a DNC event.
• Obama Blames Congress for US Debt Mess; Obama news conference, 6/29/11.

• Obama Blames Republicans for Slow Pace on Immigration Reform, 7/25/11.
• Obama Blames Media for Lack of Compromise in Washington; Obama at a town hall meeting 7/22/11.
• Obama Blames Technology for Struggling Economy; 7/14/11, NBC Today interview.

• Obama Blames Oil Spectators for High Oil Prices; 4/19/11, Obama at a town hall meeting.
• Obama Blames Reagan for America's Out of Control Debt and Spending; President Obama 4/13/11, FNS.
• Obama Blames Bush and Congress for Lack of Fiscal Discipline, 4/13/11; Obama, FNS.

• Obama Blames Bush-Congress for Putting Off Tough Decisions, 8/17/10; remarks at a fundraiser for Patty Murray.
• Obama Blames Bush for Tax Cuts, Deficits; Obama town hall on the economy in Racine, WI, 6/30/10.
• Obama Blames Bush for Deficits, 6/8/10; Obama at Boxer fundraiser.

• Obama Blames GOP for Events that Led to Gulf Oil Spill; President Obama 6/3/10, FNS.
• Obama Blames Republicans for America Not Being Able to Solve Problems; President Obama 6/3/10, FNS.
• Obama Blames Corporations for Everybody's Problems, 6/3/10, FNS.

• Obama Blames Bush for Overall Standing of American Economy, 4/19/10, at Boxer fundraiser.
• Obama Blames Bush, Congress for Deficits, 2/1/10, delivering remarks on the budget.
• Obama Blames Bush for Regulatory Policies; 1/17/10, the president at Coakley event in MA.

I could continue, but I won't. There's plenty more here.

And how are these for 'Worn-Out Dogmas'?

• "I do think at a certain point you’ve made enough money."
• "I think when you spread the wealth around, it’s good for everybody."
• "Our individual salvation depends on our collective salvation."

• "Well, Charlie, what I’ve said is that I would look at raising the capital gains tax for purposes of fairness."
• "I don't oppose all wars. What I am opposed to is a dumb war. What I am opposed to is a rash war."
• "My attitude is that if the economy’s good for folks from the bottom up, it’s gonna be good for everybody."

• "And it's not surprising then that they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or antipathy to people who aren't like them."
• "So we're going to provide a $4,000 tuition credit, every student, every year, but, students, you're going to have to give back something in return."
• "We can't drive our SUVs and eat as much as we want and keep our homes on 72 degrees at all times ... and then just expect that other countries are going to say OK."

Don't bother reading the rest of Keller's vomitus. The first paragraph is the Cliff's Notes version, a digest of evil and stupidity. Oblivious to history, economics, facts, logic and human experience, Keller and his progressive ilk are perfectly willing to lead America into hell.

And it's our job to stop these malevolent schmucks at the ballot box before it's too late.