Veteran summer intern Biff Spackle (on Twitter @BiffSpackle) has an uncanny sense of breaking news.
Seldom has a junior employee at a major, national periodical broken so many important news stories. After all, there's, well, there are certain to be important scoops we could discover if we ever went back and checked the archives.
Without further ado: we are proud to announce, after seven full years of summer internship, that Biff has been promoted to Junior Associate Clerical Analyst III.
This promotion is in recognition of his outstanding work on graphic arts, literary critiques and similar outstanding work that is simply outstanding.
With all that said, here is Spackle's latest scoop, a secret copy of the Democrat Party's official magazine. You didn't get this from us.
Hat tip: BadBlue Uncensored News
And to think, we could have made history by electing our first bag lady president!
ReplyDeleteand to think, you republican morons are going to vote for the king of liars and retards again.
ReplyDeleteAnd to think that even a mis-educated, young Leftist can find us in these obscure backwaters of the Internet. . .
ReplyDeleteIt's funny because (despite) it's being true.
ReplyDelete