Doug Ross @ Journal

The Hillary Blog is holding a First Post Contest

The Hillary Blog is now active, sort of. Her campaign folks are holding a contest: submit the first post for Hillary's blog. Hey, I thought to myself, why not me? The title of my submission? America's got a fever - and the only cure is more Clinton!


Here's my submission.

Hillary Clinton represents change for America. Under her stewardship, America is destined for a new direction. The stock market is at an all-time high. Unemployment is at 25-year lows. Taxes are at 20-year lows and Federal Receipts are at an all-time high. The national deficit has been halved over the last several years, as promised, despite a catastrophic terrorist attack that sucked a trillion dollars out of the economy. Oh, and there have been no terrorist attacks on American soil since 9/11. Hillary represents change for America. Change is good. Isn't it?

I don't think the tone of that first submission is quite -er- uplifting enough. I'm game for another try, Sparky.

It's clear from the last six years of George W. Bush that we need another Clinton in the White House. After all, Bush hasn't measured up to the first Clinton administration in many important respects: 44 Clinton administration associates were convicted or pled guilty to crimes including Sandy Berger's destruction and coverup of 9/11 documents. 33 of these convictions occurred during the Clinton administration. There were also 61 indictments and misdemeanor charges as well as 14 imprisonments. And let's not forget a Presidential Impeachment and 7 independent counsel investigations. Furthermore, 72 congressional witnesses pled the Fifth Amendment to avoid incriminating themselves and 17 witnesses fled the U.S. to avoid testifying. The Clinton administration also was masterful in its use of pardons; far better than President Bush. Clinton pardoned FALN terrorists; cocaine traffickers; mail-fraud and perjury convicts (after a $200,000 payment to Hillary's brother); Whitewater associates; and Democratic Congressman Dan Rostenkowski. And I haven't even touched upon the Clinton administration's handling of terrorism! From these statistics, it's clear that the Bush administration doesn't measure up when it comes to the scandal quota this country needs. America's got a fever, and the only cure is more Clinton!

Perhaps that submission's too dry. Too many statistics - kinda cold and calculating. I'll go for more warmth and compassion in my final try.

Hillary Clinton is serious about improving the reputation of the United States among the world's nations. Hillary Clinton -- like her husband -- just wants to share our technology. The first Clinton Administration was willing to share technology with anyone who could ante up. Over objections from the Pentagon and State Department, military/industrial technology was passed to the Chinese Military. This included ICBM precision guidance and related missile technologies that passed into Chinese hands after an unprecedented series of suspect donations. And the Clinton Administration was instrumental in North Korea's surreptitious acquisition of nuclear technology. And the Clinton administration initially opposed and then delayed any deployment of national missile defense. It's good to share. And the Clintons are good at sharing... when the price is right. We need more of the principled, savvy negotiations we saw during the first Clinton era. Put simply, we need Hillary Clinton - now more than ever.

Hmmm. I'm still not satisfied. Okay - one more try.

Bill Clinton's masterful handling of the economy is proof positive Hillary should be our next President. Two unique events influenced the United States economy during Bill Clinton's tenure, which may have impacted public perception of his handling of the economy. Tim Berners-Lee invented the World Wide Web, which was released as a free service by CERN in 1993. A massive and unprecedented spending boom accompanied the popularization of the web. Another technology-related event was Y2K, the year-2000 repair efforts. An IT spending boom -- estimated at $300 billion -- occurred in the late 1990's as governments and companies rushed to make their legacy computer systems "year-2000 compliant." The massive surge in IT spending associated with these events were coincident with the Clinton Presidency. I fully trust Hillary can duplicate Y2K and the Internet boom, which will result in another fantastic, Clinton-esque economic expansion!

I'm certain one of these four posts is a winner. Remember: America's got a fever - and the only cure is more Clinton!



More on Hillary:
A Blog for All, Bill's Bites, Bitsblog, Blogs of War, Blue Crab Boulevard, Blue Star Chronicles, Captain's Quarters, Conservative Thinking, Ed Driscoll Hot Air, Macsmind, My Vast Right Wing Conspiracy, OTB, Patrick Ruffini, Roger L. Simon, Sensible Mom, Sister Toldjah, STACLU, Wizbang . Also don't miss Hugh Hewitt and Hot Air's Hillary on Hardball skit. (Major hat tips to Larwyn and Gateway Pundit)