Good evening. I'm Bip Ripley and
this --
-- is
One Minute Action News!
Gas prices hit another record high... a national average of $4.04 a gallon.
In reaction, Democratic Congressman Dennis Kucinich attempted to launch impeachment proceedings against President Bush for "
lying the country into war," a move certain to lower gas prices.
Also, Democrats in Congress proposed to raise taxes on gas by levying a "windfall profits tax" on American oil companies. How raising taxes on gas companies will lower prices for consumers is a scientific mystery -- but that hasn't deterred the dauntless Democrat Party.
Such a "windfall" tax was last attempted during the Carter administration and it was a
roaring success -- if you liked gas lines, 15% inflation, 8% unemployment and wearing sweaters in the winter.
Meanwhile,
caribou in ANWR are picketing, demanding similar treatment to their cousins at the Prudhoe Bay oil field, where their population is up by over 900%.
Democrats issued a firm rebuke to the caribou, the harshest of which was Harry Reid's rhetorical question, "Who do the caribou think they are? Which is more important -- our initiative to compromise American's national security or growing the wildlife population?"
House leader Nancy Pelosi echoed Reid's statements. "Drilling for oil would strengthen America and give it time to become energy independent while developing green energy sources. We can't permit that!"
Now, Paul "Big Pussy" Spatafore with your seven second weather forecast...
Holy s**t, it's f****g hot out there, Skip! Gimme a f*****g break - I'm sweatin' like a f*****g bad check!
Thanks, Puss. Is it still called "climate change" or is it "global warming" now that it's summer?
Shut the f**k up before I come over there and kick your f*****g ass, you walking hairpiece!
Allllllriiiiighty then... let's swing over to Summer Arrington with seven second sports!
Thanks, Bip! Here are today's betting lines and last night's scores! Remember, if you want tonight's lock o' the week - just visit TonyVig.com!
Thank
you, Summer. Love the outfit. Tomorrow night's feature:
Barack Obama answers questions about the rumored Michelle "Whitey" video. Don't miss it.
I'm Bip Ripley and this has been today's One Minute Action News... when you don't have a
second to spare.
Good evening. I'm Bip Ripley and this --
-- is One Minute Action News!
Gas prices hit another record high... a national average of $4.04 a gallon.
In reaction, Democratic Congressman Dennis Kucinich attempted to launch impeachment proceedings against President Bush for "lying the country into war," a move certain to lower gas prices.
Also, Democrats in Congress proposed to raise taxes on gas by levying a "windfall profits tax" on American oil companies. How raising taxes on gas companies will lower prices for consumers is a scientific mystery -- but that hasn't deterred the dauntless Democrat Party.
Such a "windfall" tax was last attempted during the Carter administration and it was a roaring success -- if you liked gas lines, 15% inflation, 8% unemployment and wearing sweaters in the winter.
Meanwhile, caribou in ANWR are picketing, demanding similar treatment to their cousins at the Prudhoe Bay oil field, where their population is up by over 900%.
Democrats issued a firm rebuke to the caribou, the harshest of which was Harry Reid's rhetorical question, "Who do the caribou think they are? Which is more important -- our initiative to compromise American's national security or growing the wildlife population?"
House leader Nancy Pelosi echoed Reid's statements. "Drilling for oil would strengthen America and give it time to become energy independent while developing green energy sources. We can't permit that!"
Holy s**t, it's f****g hot out there, Skip! Gimme a f*****g break - I'm sweatin' like a f*****g bad check!
Thanks, Bip! Here are today's betting lines and last night's scores! Remember, if you want tonight's lock o' the week - just visit TonyVig.com!
Thank you, Summer. Love the outfit. Tomorrow night's feature: Barack Obama answers questions about the rumored Michelle "Whitey" video. Don't miss it.
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