Monday, November 27, 2006

What do you do with 50,000 DVDs? An Inconvenient Truth

The invaluable Larwyn writes to tell us that Newbusters' Noel Sheppard has discovered an inconvenient truth. Al Gore can't give away the DVD version of his hysteria-generating movie*.

[Gore] wanted to donate 50,000 DVD copies of the schlockumentary to the National Science Teachers Association so that educators around the country could brainwash America’s youth with Gore’s junk science. Thankfully, the NSTA said, "No Thanks"... they saw "little, if any, benefit to NSTA or its members’ in accepting the free DVDs."

So... the first question that popped into my silly little head: what does Al Gore do with 50,000 DVDs?

Decorative Coasters: nothing says the holidays like Truth-Coasters™, which gently remind guests that you care deeply about the environment and fine Pilsner beers.

Kung Fu throwing discs: for budding martial artists, Goreekin™ throwing discs are easy to throw and mega-deadly. For added performance, simply cut star points into the disc using the included template!

Pet for urban environments: put a DVD on a leash and simply drag it along as you walk... makes the perfect eco-friendly pet. Plus, it's great exercise!

Alien invasion: sneak out into a field late one night. Arrange a couple of thousand discs in a fractal-style pattern. Later, take pictures of the field from a helicopter. Blame aliens using the following storyline. Humans have been poor stewards of the Earth, which has prompted interest in our planet by alien cultures, who wish to rescue the environment.

Eco-friendly solar cooker: save on energy with a TipperHomemaker™ Solar Oven - requires only five Truth DVDs and you can save up to $425 in energy bills per year (actual savings may vary).

Assphalt™ Eco-Pavement: grind DVDs into a fine powder, mix with asphalt, and create a recycler's favorite road surface! Simple, fast, and has not (thus far) been proven toxic to humans.

That only leaves about 18,000 DVDs, so your suggestions are appreciated!

*For the definitive Q&A on Global Warming, see The American Thinker (hat tip: Larwyn).

Oven-fresh good readin', just like Mama used to make:
Anchoress: Lawyer writes a Thank-You note to President Bush
Blue Crab Boulevard: Let's focus for a moment
Captain's Quarters: Olmert offers peace, Hamas responds as usual
Confederate Yankee: Drugs are bad
Hugh Hewitt: The injured Marines Semper Fi Fund
Iraq the Model: Rough days (read first)
Macsmind: MSM Idiot Parade
OTB: Free Ghost Brigades for Soldiers!
Rick Moran: The art and artifice of war reporting
STACLU: Bogus Source Cited in NBC ‘Civil War’ Decision
USS Neverdock: US: New York Times forced to turn over phone records
Wizbang: The Supreme Court Tells The New York Times to Pound Sand

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