Hillary's Menu of Presidential Services

 
In a CNS article ("New Clinton Scandal Mirrors 'Chinagate,' Say Analysts"), Fred Lucas provides an interesting recap of the Clinton administration's questionable behavior.

The 1996 Clinton fundraising scandal, often called "Chinagate" involved numerous anecdotes but never produced a smoking gun. Reported events included the following: - Clinton friend Yah Lin "Charlie" Trie pleaded guilty to charges of violating campaign finance rules in exchange for having pending indictments dropped against him in Washington and Arkansas. - According to news reports in 1997, Democratic donor Johnny Chung received a $150,000 transfer from the Bank of China three days before he handed then-First Lady Hillary Clinton's chief of staff a $50,000 check. - Then-Vice President Al Gore received political donations from Buddhist nuns who had taken a vow of poverty. - President Clinton admitted in 1997 that he invited major campaign donors to spend the night in the White House. The Clintons hosted 404 overnight guests. - During the investigation by the Department of Justice, about 120 people connected to "Chinagate" either fled the country or pleaded the Fifth Amendment to prevent testifying... but [it] was not the only Clinton fundraising scandal. After fugitive Marc Rich's ex-wife and a Rich friend donated a combined $1.45 million to the Clinton Presidential Library, he was granted a presidential pardon just before Clinton left office in January 2001. Rich fled the United States after he was convicted of tax evasion. Also, Hillary Clinton's 2000 Senate campaign was involved in an illegal in-kind contribution from Hollywood mogul Peter Paul. That incident resulted in a $35,000 fine by the Federal Elections Committee and the indictment and later acquittal of her finance director, David Rosen...

Anticipating her election and to simplify matters for Hillary's backers, her staff has prepared a menu of suggested donations. Asked why prices had increased since her husband's days in office, staffers responded "you can chalk it up to inflation." Suggested donation levels include:

$100K - a membership in HillRaisers™ and two tickets to the 2008 Central Inauguration Party $150K - comprehensive IRS audit of any person you designate $200K - a picture of you and a partner in the Oval Office with the President and the First Dude $250K - a night in the Lincoln Bedroom with Maureen Dowd $275K - a night in the Lincoln Bedroom alone $300K - a night in the Lincoln Bedroom with one hour "happy ending" pass to the Lewinsky Massage Room $500K - one (1) presidential pardon $950K - two (2) presidential pardons (a $50K discount when ordering two!) $2.5M - your choice of either missile guidance or nuclear triggering techology