Progressive Groups to Honor KSM with NYC Ticker-Tape Parade

A wide range of progressive groups, including MoveOn.org, the ACLU, Code Pink, Media Matters, the SEIU, ACORN, Families USA, Nation of Islam, the AFT and the NEA, have banded together to welcome accused 9/11 mastermind Khalid Sheikh Mohammad to the Big Apple. The groups intend to welcome his motorcade, conducted by federal law enforcement officials, with a ticker-tape parade, a staple of New York City celebrations.


"Nothing shows how truly magnanimous the American people are better than welcoming Mr. Mohammed to the U.S. with a ticker-tape parade," said Scott Levenson, spokesman for the community organizing group ACORN. "Not only are we giving him a fair trial, we honor our Constitution and traditions by treating him with dignity and respect."

Medea Benjamin, co-founder of the peace activist group Code Pink, believes that a ticker-tape parade and rally will build good will for the United States among the world's nations. "We'll be selling cotton candy and non-pork hot dogs to honor Mr. Mohammed's visit to the city. The respect we show him will be paid back seven-fold by other nations and help remedy the damage done to our reputation by Presidents Reagan, Bush and Bush."

Louis Farrakhan, leader of the religious group Nation of Islam, was equally excited. He likened the event to the election of Barack Obama. "It's a great day for all citizens of the world, so why not celebrate?"

The White House also announced that Air Force One will be dispatched to retrieve Mr. Mohammed from the Guantanamo Bay Detention Facility. The plane will also do several "fly-bys" of Ground Zero in order to orient the detainee with the location of his trial.

Liberal Democrats are said to be ecstatic with the move. Senator Chuck Schumer, senior Senator from New York, said that welcoming Mr. Mohammed to the "city that never sleeps" will demonstrate to the world that the Bush era is truly over.