Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Obama administration unveils 'Cash for Codgers' program; aims to save billions on health care for seniors

In light of new reports that health care premiums are rising three times faster than they did prior to the passage of Obamacare and that overall costs will tally hundreds of billions higher than predicted, Cub Reporter Biff Spackle files this exclusive report:

As part of the federal government's efforts to rein in health care spending, the Department of Health and Human Services has instituted a generous offer available to all U.S. residents.

The Senior Euthanasia Reimbursement Program (euphemistically known as "Cash for Codgers") will offer each family a cash honorarium for any senior residing in their household aged 65 and over. Said seniors will be dispensed with humanely, in accordance with the recommendations of Ezekiel "Doctor Death" Emanuel.

In these tough economic times, what's better than solving the entitlement crisis and addressing senior health care issues -- simultaneously? It very well could be the final solution to the fiscal challenges of government-run health care.

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