Sunday, March 31, 2013

North Korean Deklaration of Konflict Kaption Kontest

North Korea announced Saturday that it has entered a state of war against South Korea. In a special statement, the North said it will deal with every inter-Korean issue in a wartime manner.

Therefore Zero Hedge is running the obligatory caption contest with this gem:


The best captions thus far?

• "...and the last nuke is for Florida Gulf Coast University for busting my NCAA bracket."
• "Why would I want billions, when I can have millions? How do you spell 'War'?"
• "For the love of God, where's Rodman?"

• "Anyone notice the iMac on his desk!? Long live Jobs!"
• "...and clam chowder, and a large bowl of chili con carne, and a side order of bacon, with sour cream, and cream-filled doughnuts, ice cream with marshmallow topping, and chocolate syrup, and..."
• "Wasn't he the guy that made that Gangnam Style video?"

• "Dear Un, if you are going to take a shot, aim at the District of Criminals."
• "Hory shit! According to my carcurations, I rost f---ing errything in Cyprus! Damn you, Deeser-broom!!! Damn you straight to herr!!!"
• Is that a Bic pen he is using to plot the overthrow of western civilization?

• "Dear Pen Pal, I was so happy to get your letter. I have just returned home from a trip to threaten the world powers. I am 30 years old and have worked really hard to destabilize the region. It has been very difficult to carry on ever since my father died..."
• "Dear Steve, My dogs and I were working on this new nuke project plan, but every time I try the save on iCloud, I get 'Server not found - check your internet connection'. What is going on? Also what is this yellow cable for? Un"

• "Hmmm... So I can save money if I use FedEx"
• "It took me like three hours to finish the shading on your upper lip. It's probably the best drawing I've ever done."
• "Let's see ... they have three longbowmen to my two horse archers. They get additional strength for city defense. I'm going to need the war elephants."


Related: Don't miss The 15 Funniest Staged Kim Jong-un Military Photos.


3 comments:

Doom said...

It would be sad if... No, it's sad.

I've given up my goal of ruling a country just because of him!

Bill G said...

Obama has Eric Holder, but my new hot shot will be Geoffrey Holder who is pushing the Un cola. Take that Mayor Bloomberg and your "Big Gulp".
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JinBKqSCSac&sns=em

Anonymous said...

Anyone see this differing from the DNC?
**************************
ECONOMICS
The Socialist Party stands for a fundamental transformation of the economy, focusing on production for need not profit. So-called fair trade is meaningless as long as the world economy is dominated by a few massive corporations. Only a global transformation from capitalism to democratic socialism will provide the conditions for international peace, justice, and economic cooperation based on the large-scale transfer of resources and technology from the developed to the developing countries.
* We demand the immediate withdrawal of the United States from the North American Free Trade Agreement (NAFTA) and the Central American Free Trade Agreement (CAFTA), and oppose the creation of a widened Free Trade Area of the Americas (FTAA).
* We call for worker and community ownership and control of corporations within the framework of a decentralized and democratically determined economic plan.
* We call for a minimum wage of $15 per hour, indexed to the cost of living.
* We call for a full employment policy. We support the provision of a livable guaranteed annual income.
* We call for all financial and insurance institutions to be socially owned and operated by a democratically-controlled national banking authority, which should include credit unions, mutual insurance cooperatives, and cooperative state banks. In the meantime, we call for re-regulation of the banking and insurance industries.
* We call for a steeply graduated income tax and a steeply graduated estate tax, and a maximum income of no more than ten times the minimum. We oppose regressive taxes such as payroll tax, sales tax, and property taxes.
* We call for the restoration of the capital gains tax and luxury tax on a progressive, graduated scale.
* We call for compensation to communities-- and compensation, re-training, and other support service for workers-- affected by plant and military base closings as stop-gap measures until we reach our goal of creating a socialist society totally separate from the global capitalist economy.
* We oppose the International Monetary Fund, the World Bank, and the World Trade Organization as instruments of capitalist oppression throughout the world.
* We demand cancellation of Third World debt.
* We call for a National Pension Authority to hold the assets of private pension funds, and a levy against corporate assets for any pension fund deficits.
* We call for increased and expanded welfare assistance and increased and expanded unemployment compensation at 100% of a worker's previous income or the minimum wage, whichever is higher, for the full period of unemployment or re-training, whichever is longer.
* We support a program of massive federal investment in both urban and rural areas for infrastructure reconstruction and economic development.
* We support tax benefits for renters equal to those for homeowners.
* We call for the elimination of subsidies and tax breaks that benefit corporations and all other forms of corporate welfare.
* We oppose the court-created precedent of “corporate personhood” that illegitimately gives corporations rights that were intended for human beings


Socialist Party USA: 2012-2013 National Platform
http://socialistparty-usa.net/platform.html