Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Top 30 #GutfeldGayBarNames

There was a hot time in the old Twittersphere last night after Greg Gutfeld unloaded an idea made of pure unvarnished awesome.

30. Honor Drillings
29. Jihard
28. Filthy Omar’s Rusty Trombone
27. The Arabian Queen
26. Dune Biters
25. Goat's Night Off
24. The Pink Prophet
23. The Leather Burqa
22. Git Mo
21. Pig in a Poke
20. Sheiks & Freaks
19. Sodom and Gonorrhea
18. Osama Bin Dover
17. The Exploding Goat
16. Weapons of Ass Destruction
15. Alla Assbar
14. Anderson Cooper's Apartment
13. The Sticky Prophet
12. The Sphinxter
11. Grind Zero
10. Nuclear Fuel Rods
9. Hassan's TestostoRoom
8. Turbuns
7. Bunker Busters
6. The Tali-bone
5. Al-Jizzera
4. The Gaza Stripper
3. The Sandy Gerbil
2. The Camel’s Hump
1. Hide the Minaret
I’m announcing tonight, that I am planning to build and open the first gay bar that caters not only to the west, but also Islamic gay men. To best express my sincere desire for dialogue, the bar will be situated next to the mosque Park51, in an available commercial space.

This is not a joke. I’ve already spoken to a number of investors, who have pledged their support in this bipartisan bid for understanding and tolerance.

As you know, the Muslim faith doesn’t look kindly upon homosexuality, which is why I’m building this bar. It is an effort to break down barriers and reduce deadly homophobia in the Islamic world.

The goal, however, is not simply to open a typical gay bar, but one friendly to men of Islamic faith. An entire floor, for example, will feature non-alcoholic drinks, since booze is forbidden by the faith. The bar will be open all day and night, to accommodate men who would rather keep their sexuality under wraps – but still want to dance.

Ed Morrissey: "I look forward to the congratulatory Mike Bloomberg press conference."

Update: iOwnTheWorld.

Update II: Um, Did Greg Gutfeld Just Kill The Ground Zero Mosque?


A Lawyer Mom's Musings said...

I totally vote for number 29.

Anonymous said...

Really?! Nobody came up with "MuhamMEN"?!

I claim it.

vermindust said...

Comments as Ace of Spades came up with "A La Cock Bar", and with "Naughty Arabia".
I think it will need windows of 4" lexan and some very potent fire supression systems.

Right Wing Professor said...

Most of the 30 names are excellent. I think this means you'll have to open a chain of gay bars.

I'd like to negotiate on the Riyadh franchise.

GulfCoastBamaFan said...

I thought Ali Bobbers should have at least gotten honorable mention.

Anonymous said...

I think someone should open a GAY bathhouse next door to the mosque and also a BBQ Pork slaughtering house too.

Anonymous said...

Completely believe you are sincere. Don't let me down.

Wall Street Gypsy said...

How about a name like: "Boyz with Burquas"??

rick_randy said...

Sheik rattle and blow.
blow me bar
Inbred and friends
momma needs love
first cousins only.
the gay bomber
The leather sucide belt.
East of Anus
the middle ass earner
pork and mindy's
The bomb factory
Jihad's ass bandit cabaret
Mulla's rouge
sharmootas bar
the animal husbandry bar
Behind the prophet.