Friday, August 12, 2011

Top 10 Obama Excuses for the Failing Economy

[Hat tip to Keith Koffler for the inspiration]

10. Tsunami in Japan completely disrupted arugula supply chain

9. Entire nation thrown into emotional abyss by Casey Anthony acquittal

8. Blockbuster Congressional movie Barney Frank & Friends tanked at box office

7. Unexpected collapse of massive, doddering European welfare state (which, by the way, doesn't hold any lessons for our own massive, doddering welfare state)

6. Export of heavy weapons to Libya well below forecast

5. Decision to film new season of Jersey Shore in Italy sucked millions from East Coast economy

4. Republicans filibustered my plan to invade Fort Knox

3. Oprah totally bailed on her pledge to give every American a Chevy Volt

2. Repairing the economies of all 57 states proving more difficult than anticipated

1. I've always said that the economy would be back to normal by 2016 and the start of my third term


2421Rich said...

#11 - The Republicans are riged and holding the country hostage by refusing to raise taxes during a depression but I (Obama)am just being realistic and sensible when I insist we must have more of the citizens money so we can send it to Hamas or use it to fund high speed rail.

2421Rich said...

i meant "ridged". Sorry!

locomotivebreath1901 said...


I bet Letterman can't wait to pilfer this for Monday night.

Anonymous said...

Why don't you give "rigid" a try...