Saturday, August 20, 2011

Breaking: President Calls for Section 8 Housing on Martha's Vineyard

By Biff Spackle:

Citing a concern with diversity on the posh resort island of Martha's Vineyard, a vacationing President Barack Obama today called for a massive local buildup of Section 8 Housing.

"To paraphrase a famous movie," the President joked, "'I see white people.' In all seriousness, our national mandate for diversity demands that we integrate Martha's Vineyard, which today is a haven for millionaires and billionaires, as well as corporate jet- and yacht-owners, almost all of whom have pasty white complexions. And just think of all of the thousands of construction jobs we'll save or create!"

The President's auto-pen in Washington signed an Executive Order commanding the Department of Housing and Urban Development (HUD) to build "not less than three thousand low-income housing units on the north side of the island near Lambert's Cove."

In a prepared statement, former HUD Secretary and current Governor of New York, Andrew Cuomo praised the move. "It's high time the pampered wealthy on the Vineyard experienced some of the pain all of the rich people have inflicted upon society. The residents of the Vineyard need to see what it's like to deal with high unemployment, flash mobs, high unemployment, flash mobs, and crappy schools run by iron-fisted teachers' unions.

Continued on Page D-17

7 comments:

mRed said...

Having worked on Martha's Vineyard and Nantucket over many years this is the most pandering and stupid statement I have ever heard uttered by a President of the United States. The lifeguards should force him out of the deep end and back to the kiddie pool.

el chupacabra said...

You got me- for a minute there you got me.
I'm watching you, always watching...

The Machiavellian said...

Doug,

You've got it all wrong. In Cincinnati for example, HUD seems to like to put Section 8 housing in predominately Republican areas of late.

No way the left would ever want to live among those they claim to help : )

Georg Felis said...

I'll put my money on it being either an Onion article, or Iowahawk...

Bones said...

Ya messed up, the Vineyard is in MA not NY

Cinemagic said...

Seriously???? Mr Pres? It is a resort area and it costs $$$ to go there!! How bout these missing "black" people you are talking about actually go out and EARN their way to visiting, or living on Martha's Vineyard?
This is an EQUAL opportunity country and if you WORK you can do ANYTHING--You are living proof of that aren't you? So why do you only "see" white people... maybe you should ask your black supporters what they are doing with their time....

Anonymous said...

Geez.Obama is clueless.I remember Oaks Bluffs being a wealthy Republican enclave of Negroes and Cape Verdean. Many families had photos of their Caucasian relatives....from Dixie (ie:Adam Clayton Powell).I am sorry to say I saw Obama as trouble based on his voting record and his non existant record of helping constituents.