Al Gore's Visit Blamed for DC's Record-Blasting Snowstorm: Up to Three Feet of Warmal Colding Expected

Al Gore must be visiting Washington, DC. The unexplained attraction severe weather has for the tubby grifter -- known in scientific circles as "The Gore Effect" -- is the only rational explanation for the monstrous snowstorm now burying the nation's capitol.

Up to three feet of snow (between 28" and 36", depending upon which meteorologist you trust) will warm the Beltway before the storm peters out to the Northeast.

Bean-o, my trusted reporter in the Bethesda, Maryland area, reports he's been without power for 12 hours and there are estimates of a half-million similarly affected households.

But remember, folks: weather ain't climate. The United Nations' International Panel on Climate Crime (I hear that's what "IPCC" stands for) says that all of the record-crushing cold is because of warming. Or something.