While Tucker Carlson Is Busy Investigating Michele Bachmann's Medicine Cabinet, Check Out This Scrapbook Biff Spackle Found

Yoo hoo, Tucker, look what our enterprising cub reporter Biff Spackle found in the dumpster behind ACORN headquarters:

The Secret Scrapbook of Barry Soetero Barack Obama
My early mentor "Frank" in Hawaii. Pity the neocons found out who it really was!

Here's my original registration at my first school in Jakarta, Indonesia. It has my old name (Barry Soetoro) with my religion listed as Islam. Go figure.

My grass roots organizing days, training ACORN (note: I don't condone trading crack cocaine for votes - "aggressive" voter registration: yes, crack: no).

At the beginning of my political career. I was a member of the Democratic Socialists of America's New Party and got a great endorsement from them. Stepping stones, baby, stepping stones! Of course, I still believe in wealth redistribution!

My first sugar daddy -- Tony Rezko -- in the early years. And to think I used to consider 250 grand a lot of dough!

The education guru, Bill Ayers! Thank goodness no one ever figured out that he named me the Chairman of the Annenberg Challenge before the political "coming out party" at his and Bernadine's house!

Here's me and Jimmy Hoffa (the son, silly, I was only 9 when his Dad disappeared!)

My spiritual mentor, Jeremiah, who always gets the crowd riled up! (Of course, I never heard any of it -- tee hee!)

Me and Michie at the Arab-American Action Network dinner with Ed Said (hey, he's no longer a member of the PLO, 'cause he's dead!)

Boy, this church newsletter caused me some problems! Jeremiah published this Hamas editorial and I heard no end of grief. Of course, no one in the real world knows I read it and empathize!

My buddy the Rev. James Meeks (I know he's a gay-basher, but he mixes a great martini!)

This is from my trip to Kenya in '96 where I supported my cousin Raila Odinga. He was also running for office. He's a great guy who wants to bring order back to the country (I know so because he signed this "Memorandum of Understanding" to bring Taliban-style Sharia law to Kenya)!

Two community organizers make good!

Back in the motherland!

Here's ex-Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick -- he's in a bit of legal trouble, but I included this photo 'cuz it shows my favorite teleprompter.

I hate that b***h!

I LOVE THIS GUY!