I have just published a report by three statistics wizards showing, quite convincingly, that all of the material we ran the past year and a half was likely bunk.
It's true. Thousands of years of human experience show quite convincingly that modern progressives are socialist retreads. Facts, logic and reason demonstrate beyond a shadow of a doubt that the liberals' big government-slash-socialist agenda inevitably leads to the destruction of societies.
Quite some time ago, we embarked on a secret project to revamp the content of the Daily Kos website. We intended to -- and have succeeded beyond our wildest dreams -- in replacing The Onion as the thinking man's humor portal.
If you Google "hilarious political satire", we're definitely on the first page of results along with JibJab and the entire New York Times editorial board.
And next year we will release our first motion picture, modeled after the National Lampoon Vacation series of films. Look for Kos Goes to College and Learns to Write Good in theaters mid-third-and-a-half-quarter 2011.
Kos also noted that "Premium Banner" sponsorships of the movie are still available but are selling fast.